06. The Safe Space of Sisterhood

What about your ffffrrrrrriiiiieeeennnnndddddsssssss???!!! As we get older, I feel like all millennial adults talk about is how difficult is finding your tribe. I’m so glad that is not my portion.

As a child, I don’t feel like I had many friends. I was super shy and kinda awkward which all equates to insecurity. I don’t feel like I really found my place with friend groups until I got older and became more sure of myself.

Through heartbreaks, life accomplishments, and everything else that life throws at us, I’m so appreciative of my girls. I’m surrounded by some amazing women and if they only knew how much my heart smiles when we get together.

Bestie for the restie

I don’t even think I can put into words how important it is to find a core group of friends that you can depend on. We don’t need 10, 36, or 100 friends. Get you a good solid 5/6 and you’ll be good. And I know it’s easier said than done but if you go into these relationships with good intentions, the good will come back. To my girls, I love y’all

My lawyer baddie

05. The Hardest Grace To Give

Grace is hard enough to extend. Even harder when it’s to myself.

…is to myself. Over time, I have tried to figure out the best ways to overcome this but I’m still struggling. Still.

Without fail, it’s like my brain goes into overtime throwing the harshest words (or thoughts) at myself for the simplest mistakes. It’s a daily constant uphill battle. I have all the affirmations, playlists, bible verses, accomplishments to combat my brain but baby I’m mean lol. To people when warranted and to myself unfortunately.

So…I’m learning (as we all are). As mean as I can get when others play in my face is the same tone and delivery I give myself (apparently it’s the only way I’ll listen 🫠). I’m thankful for Porsha on her interview with Angie, because girl shut the freak up.

She ate when she got on Beyoncé internet with this message 🫨

If you also struggle, let’s promise each other that we will tap into our delusion. We will walk into every room like we’re all that and a bag of chips (because you are). You are that girl and just because the world struggles with accepting we walk it like we talk it, does not mean we have to be a crab in that barrel.

I love you sista. Treat yourself better than what you look for in others 🤎

03. How I’m Balancing Grad School, Teaching, & Still Making Time For Me

For a lot of people, the Spring semester of grad school started this past Tuesday and I’m already behind 🫠. Please respect my privacy and don’t ask me how and I’m only 3 days in. Getting this M.Ed is super important and I’m currently on a moderate paced sprint to the finish line (coming December 2026). In order for me to get to that finish line with my mental in tact, I need to make sure I’m balancing all the important things in my life. The Lord did not put me on his good green earth to just work. So I’m making time to work hard and play just as hard.

For starters, setting specific days/times when I will sit and do all things grad school are a big help. I put a prompt in ChatGPT to make a calendar for all the things I am doing. Right now I have 3 days out of the week that I have devoted to this. No matter what, I stick to this schedule because I know it’ll give me the allowance to still do all the other activities I actively participate in on the regular. I rely heavily on my icalendar and my planner to keep me on track. If it’s not in either of those…it ain’t happening.

Monthly solo dates are a major 🔑. Not only is this something I keep on my bingo card every year, but it gives me something to look forward to when the days are dragging and I feel like my fire is starting to dim. My first solo date of the year is coming soon and I’m super excited about it. I can sometimes get dependent if my friends will come with me but I have to tap back into the mind frame of if it’s something I really want to do, then I shouldn’t let if I’ll have a buddy determine if I go or not. Life is crazy 🙃 and we all should find happiness in all the little things.

This seems like it should go without saying but no is a complete sentence. I don’t need to be everywhere, doing all the things if I don’t have the capacity to do so. If I had a long day of dealing with y’all kids and I need to rest, it’s ok for me to do that. I feel like it’s easier to say no or think things over before giving a fast yes. Because the same feelings I have about not saying yes are the ones that come up when I change my mind and have to figure out how to break the news to the other person. Pray my strength. I’m determined to finish out my grad school career better than I did in undergrad. So far I’m on the right track as long as I keep these things in mind. What are y’all doing to stay afloat if you’re in grad school?

02. I Miss A Man and I Hate It

Y’all…I miss a man. I miss a man that lied to me. I miss a man that I let my guard down around. I miss a man that I hate I gave my attention after being single for several months. I miss a man who I had no intention of meeting anyone the night I went out and met him. I miss a man that even though I was questioning and side-eyeing just about everything he said but still continued to give him the benefit of the doubt.

I miss that man but…it’s ok. My body is catching up to realizing that he is no longer apart of my life. That all that time I spent driving back and forth to spend time with him is over with. It’s all apart of the dating scene and I’m learning to give myself grace. I can’t expect to meet my husband if I’m completely closed off to the world. These feelings would have had to come eventually right? As much as I would love to just step outside and meet my husband, life doesn’t work like that.

I’m learning to realize that I am, as cliche as it sounds, a lover girl. If I’m interested in you, I’m all in. 10 toes. Even as I’m sitting here typing this, that trait is literally in my DNA. I’ve tried many, many, many times to turn it off but clearly fail 🫠. I don’t think I want to turn that part of me off even if I could. Could I be more guarded or mindful about jumping in head first every time…sure. But…‘tis life. I’ll keep being the lover girl I am…just a more mindful, cautious lover girl 🥰

One of the last pictures he took before 💩 hit the fan. Should I delete the ones he took of only me too?

01. My Top 5 Reads by Black Authors for 2025

Last year, I made a goal of reading 24 books and surpassed that by reading a total of 53 books. So here’s a recap of some of my favs…in no particular order.

Only for the Week by Natasha Bishop

The MMC (main male character) is THE example of my “may this kind of love find me”. Rome was so intentional in the things he did with Janelle. Of course, there were bumps along the way, but what perfect love story doesn’t. It was beautiful to read how everything fell into place for them. Read this now, read it today.

Cutthroat by Octavia Grant

I could not help but to give this book 5 stars. From the time I clicked on the cover in my Kindle to the very end when I “turned” the last page, Octavia had me by the scalp (and that ain’t hard to do seeing as how I only have a scoop of hair lol). I’m not going to say too much other than if you haven’t read this yet you needed to do it like yesterday.

Wash Hair Diaries by Jamila Rowser

This graphic novel was such a cute, light-hearted read about sisterhood. Each character went through her own situation but with the support of the other women in the friend group, they were able to overcome. Somebody cue the Girlfriends theme song.

Matriarch by Tina Knowles

I love a good memoir. I’m very much nosey Rosie and any information I can learn about a person’s life I appreciate. Ms. Tina really takes the reader through her life from the beginning and through all the good and bad times. She helped me gain even more of an understanding of why the family matriarch is so so so important.

Losing Sight by Tati Richardson

This was my introduction into Tati’s work and it was utter perfection. As a 4-eyed baddie, it had me hoping I too can find a pair of magical glasses so I can fall in love with a sexy eye Dr. Heck, I’ll take a pair of magical glasses to see through all the male baddies of this sassy apocalypse. Eeeeeeeeeeyyyyuuuucccckkkk!